Figuring out what I wanna be when I grow up.
Oop..I AM grown up...

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Is Today Wednesday? CRAP!!!

It's a lovely autumn day out there.  There's a bite in the air, and there was frost on the ground when I stepped outside this morning to take the kids to school.  Well gee whiz, I even got to scrape some frost of my windows, and then I chuckled and said; "hyuk, hyuk, winter's just around the corner!  Isn't that precious???" 

As if. 

Actually, you can keep the part about the lovely autumn day, and something about biting, but by the time I flung myself out the door to my car, I was much dismayed to see the sheet of white on the windows.  FROST?!?  I HAVE NO TIME FOR FROST!
The Man is at the office all this week for meetings and such, and I, the most slovenly mother of all, have become accustomed to his help getting the kids ready in the morning.  He makes breakfast for the kids, and packs Jack's snack (say that five times fast), which involves throwing a chocolate pudding and a spoon into his snack bag, but just the same, he does it.  This leaves me at liberty to get out of bed TOO LATE AGAIN, with NO TIME FOR YOGA AND SITUPS AGAIN, so I must RUSH LIKE AN IDIOT AGAIN to get washed, makeuped (seriously, that sounds closer to the truth than "made up"), and wrestle with my hair to turn it from a mop into some sort of shiny, sexy helmet.  He also wages the BATTLE TO GET DRESSED, and helps put socks on.  SNIFF! I'm getting verklempt just thinking about it. 

But like I said, he's not here people.  He's already ambled on down the highway to a destination of peace, civility and adult conversation.  I am left behind to have endless unwanted conversations about farts, poops, that kid in the class who was throwing rocks, and constant requests for YOU NAME IT.  And just for fun, why not sprinkle in a little verbal abuse for the dinner I provided last night:

Jack:  "I want cheese and chocolate milk for dinner, Mum."  *** must interject here and note that Jack has not eaten cheese for the past three months at least, so this is kind of exciting, but it means that we're going to rip through one of those large blocks in about two days.  It should also be noted that that is ALL he wanted for dinner.
Then Jack spots me flipping french toast in the frying pan. 
Jack:  "I DON'T WANT PANCAKE TOAST FOR DINNER!"  Yeah, I call it 'pancake toast,' because that nice little name for it actually convinced Jack it was okay to eat it. 
Well, I won't tell you the rest of that harangue, which involved me being "stupid," for making him pancake toast,  and pancake toast is "stupid," and the way I make it is "stupid," I should leave the toast "normal," and not "toast it up," and blah, blah, yadda yadda, me so tired.  This all probably occurred about the same time Jon was saying; "hm, I think I'll try this pineapple chicken now," as he was having dinner with his parents and brother for his brother's birthday, somewhere far, far away in suburban hell.

Needless to say, I was a little burnt out at the end of the day.  By the time the fight twins had baths, and were in their bed, and I finally finished washing the dishes, I was TOASTED UP myself.  And it's a bloody good thing, when The Man strolled in the door at 9:00 PM, that he never asked; "so, how was your day?" because I'd have SNAPPED. 

Fast Forward to this morning:  as usual, I could not get out of bed, and then had to horse the kids along to make up for all the time their MOTHER wasted by NOT getting out of bed in time.  We made it to school with about three minutes to spare before the bell rang.  Then I took Ella to her nursery school, where she cried and had a fit for about ten minutes that she didn't want me to go, and that she wanted to come home with me, and she didn't mind that I'd be cleaning because "I like the sound of your vacuum, Mommy!" but really she hates it.  I drove home, and decided to put on my gardening gloves, and hack the wilted plants out of the garden.  Loved it.  Loved the fresh air, and the autumn sunshine.  Then I came in and got the coffee all assembled, and my oatmeal made, and I was just about to flip the coffee maker on when

Wednesday is Jack's "show and tell" day.  Jack, of course, had been sent to school with no "show and tell" objet  (that's French for "object" which is supposed to make me sound smart, and not the idiot poseur that I actually am).  I phoned the school and cryptically related my dilemma, then went hunting in Jack's room where I found his favourite Van Gogh story book under his bed.  I turned the coffee maker on, threw on my sweater, and raced off in my car (it's about a two minute drive, if I get a red light) to the school, and I can only HOPE that the kid hasn't had show and tell yet, and felt the mortification that all kids feel when they forget something important for school.  He would NOT be pleased with me. 

Pant, pant, pant...

I came home and still had plenty of time to enjoy my oats, COFFEE (with lovey dovey hearts around it), and googling random things.  And this, my friends, is what my horoscope tells me about today:

Your horoscope for November 3, 2010

Give the fire a rest today, karen, and recharge your battery. Stick close to home and take a load of your feet. Convince someone to give you a massage, or better yet, go to a professional. You deserve a break.

Oh magic, gorgeous massage boy, I have some free time between 4 and 5 this afternoon. 

image reference


  1. Is this only a blog persona or are you this scary in person? LOl

    Just asking.....Is everyday horrible?

  2. These days, I make that comment every day and at several points in the day:

    "Is today Thursday? CRAP!!!"
    "Is it 4pm already? CRAP!!!"
    "Is it 9am? CRAP!!!!"

    A permanent state of semi-panic is not a great place in which to live.

    Yet in the face of that, I heard on the radio yesterday morning the message I needed to hear the most - and I saw this frame of mind for what it was. Now the past two days have been relatively peaceful despite no relief in the circumstances swirling around. Hope in the midst of hardship is a precious thing.

    Also, I am thankful your man is a wise man. Was Jack the show-and-tell hero?

  3. yes Melissa, nearly every day is indeed this revolting.

  4. well Matt, I think show and tell turned out alright in the end, but I'm never able to pry any fun details out of Jack. Whenever I ask him anything about school, he says; 'I don't know," which probably means, "I'm home and don't want to talk about it".
    Most days are so similar to the last, I'm thinking of lumping them as one GIANT day of the week, rather than 7: BLURSDAY.
    Oh well, it wasn't all bad in the end: my sister came over for dinner :)

  5. and by the way, Melissa--where the heck did your blog go???

  6. Blursday! lol copyright THAT one, quickly!

  7. how does one copyright stuff...okay, "Blursday" copyright Karen C------- November 3, 2010. All rights reserved. Don't steal my stuff.

  8. hehehehehe. Blursday. I'm going to have to use that!

    Scary? That's a bit dramatic. Funny. But hey, let's face. Most creative forces are tormented souls. Happy-happy-joy-joy people don't typically become creative geniuses.

    Well, off to enjoy the rest of Blursday! hehe.


    P.S. FAB dinner. Seriously. So good I could slam my fist on the table in a dramatic, "MMMMM!"

  9. Karen
    I made a new blog...come join me at Pink Satin Sashes. I am going to be your friend now.


  10. happy happy joy joy people! Ah ha ha ha ha! That made my whole day..well, for now, until I have to resume being a tortured soul again.

    yeah, that mac and cheese kicked ass.

  11. Okay Melissa, when next I get a minute, I'm truckin' on over!


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