Figuring out what I wanna be when I grow up.
Oop..I AM grown up...

Monday, January 31, 2011

How To Kill The PMS Monster? Part 2: The SUPPLEMENT

Friday January 28

SO, I went to the health food store, right after I dropped the kids off for school.  Right around the time I was so tired, I didn't think I could survive the six minute walk to said store.  Right around the time I was exhausted from shrieking like an idiot during that hectic getting-ready-for-school hour.

I walked in and asked the nice, new-agey looking lady what their best-selling, most effective PMS supplement was.  She asked me if I had bad PMS, and what kind of symptoms I suffered.  I told her casually about how it lasts 2 weeks, and has all the usual symptoms x 100, blah, blah, blah.  However, she got stuck on the 2 weeks part and I then had the pleasure of her wide-eyed, unblinking stare for the next few minutes while she exclaimed; "WOW..."  Yeah, okay lady, I get it.  So, she directed me straight over to the Lorna Vanderhaeghe section.   Ms. V has a whole line of products for women, and it says the following on the little product leaflet I was given:
"Lorna Vanderhaeghe, MS, is Canada's leading women's health expert and has been researching nutritional medicine for over 25 years."

To read more about Lorna, and to read more about her products/books, etc, go HERE.

So, the store clerk insisted that this product is "great," and also is "the best."  She didn't even recommend any others. 


Balanced hormones ensure effortless periods, clear skin, a symptom-free perimenopause, lots of energy and vitality.  (
ooo!  I could use some vitality!)

What to expect from this product:
* Maintains healthy estrogen-to-progesterone balance (yay)
* Detoxifies toxic estrogens from plastics, pesticides, cosmetics and more (okay, that's good)
* Stops flooding, heavy, debilitating periods (YO! I'm DOWN with that!)
* Halts abnormal cell growth, including breast lumps, fibroids, cysts, endometriosis, thick uterine lining  (mmm...endometriosis)

* For those with PCO's and ovarian cysts (what the hell are PCO's?  Must google...could that stand for 'polycystic ovaries???)

* Halts the conversion of good estrogens (2-hydroxyestrone) to bad estrogens (16-hydroxyestrone)  (yeah...mmkay...your standard 'what the eff is that' type scientific stuff)
* Elimianates PMS and makes periods effortless (effortless.  Interesting.  Can't wait to see about that one)
* Maintains healthy PAP smears (let's all collectively CRINGE)

* Eliminates hormonal acne (good luck!!!  Does this mean I won't have to toss that flesh-coloured zit stick in my purse wherever I go for a while???)

Alrighty then!  That all sounds like a SMORGASBORD of WONDERFUL. 

So, I got a jar of Estrosmart, and a little vial of some kind of floral essence stuff, that supposedly will quell anxiety if I squirt just 4 little drops onto my tongue--but the anxiety stuff is besides the point. 

Sound exciting?  Or does it sound like a WHOLE LOT OF QUAKERY???  Time will tell, my friends!  I'll start taking it on Saturday.  Stay tuned...

* Hey!  Want the whole PMS Story?  Click Any of the links below:

How To Kill The PMS MONSTER??? Part 1

How To Kill The PMS Monster? Part 2: The SUPPLEMENT

How To Kill The PMS Monster - Part 3: Hormone-o-rama

How To Kill The PMS Monster Part 4: Maybe They're Really That Annoying

How To Kill The PMS Monster Part 5: PMS Can Suck It!


  1. I would really like to know how this works out. Perhaps I should take a walk down to the store adn get me some of that! My PMS does not last as long (sorry) however for about 5 days my body feels like it is working in over-drive and my brain cant keep up! I get a strange thing stomach HURTS, not my actual stomach...kinda feels like how you would feel after eating KFC...only teh feeling lasts for about 5 days. So not fun. Its almost like having the stomach flu for a week out of every month...this started just after I had Coco. Man it sucks...
    sounds like a bit of heaven in a bottle. Must try it. ( I have changed from perhaps to I WILL goto the store to get some as write this) We can compare notes!

  2. I have taken some of her stuff..and don't ask me why because I have no recollection. But she had some stuff advertised latley and interested me too, except I forget what it was for...I know not helpful at all.

  3. I was taking her supplement Vitex for fertility reasons. It was supposed to shorten my cycle help with cramps and help with fertility. I was on it for years. Still one kid!
    I wonder about all these miracle supplements..I've tried everything and read everything I can find. Still never found an answer.
    And then I wonder is it diet? So eating the wrongs things will greatly effect these vitamins we take? I am so confused and no one ever has answers for me.

    Is it just me or do the women who work at these health food stores look unhealthy? They seem to be here.

  4. Hey again! I am going to have to get some of this stuff..PRONTO! Wanted to let you know that I gave you a fun award on my blog today, so come check it out when you have time :)

  5. okay Steph, you can do the experiment along with me. That's odd about the stomach ache. Another wonderful symptom to add to the list! 5 days, I'm sure, feels long enough to you eh?

  6. Melissa, she's got all kinds of crap. If there's a womanly SUFFERING, she's got a pill for what ails ya. We shall see. Hmm...actually, the kids are fighting like crazy now and I just feel like I'm floating on a calm, dead sea...

  7. Pam--ha ha! Yes, the hardcore vitamin/nutrition people do tend to look unhealthy--espcially if they're vegans. I haven't seen a vegan who didn't look grey.

    Anyhow, I too wonder about these miracle pills and all their wonderful claims. Maybe I just made her $33 richer.

  8. thanks JD--you're too kind :) I figured I'm just the grouch in the corner over here. My husband is skeptical, and thinks I have to go through at least 2 cycles to know. Bah. What does he know anyway????

  9. I would think it will take some time to work, but anything is worth a go.

  10. A am completely disappointed with that product's claims! Not one mention of whether it would provide scrub-free toilets for your home, pre-prepare your dinners, or make your children mute by the power of your eyes. Sadly, science lets us down again!

  11. Agreed, chania. Time will tell--still, I didn't want to kill anyone in my family today, so it smells like PROGRESS!

  12. Matt, what I loved the best was making the children mute by the powers of my eyes. That was awesome. Well, maybe science should spend a little more time on that, and a little less time perfecting the television no? Oh wait...that's almost the same thing.

  13. lol! Too funny and too true.


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