Figuring out what I wanna be when I grow up.
Oop..I AM grown up...

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Post Vacation Blues

Well, I'm back. 


Okay, okay, I'm not a total baby:  I realise that REAL LIFE does not involve floating around leisurely in a heated salt water pool like a big, fat starfish, with palm trees waving gently overhead, and when swimming is finished you get yourself a big old rum and coke...or four...  And I know that the average person's view is not a calm ocean, lapping endlessly onto soft, soft, cool white sand.  I also know that in FREAKING FEBRUARY, it's not common around these here parts to see the sun very often, and 95% of everyone here is suffering MASSIVE VITAMIN D DEPRIVATION

Yes, and it's true, we can't sleep in every day till 8:30 or 9, then get up, have breakfast on a completely screened in balcony that looks out over the aforementioned peaceful ocean, and drink our coffee with a contented heart thrumming in a nice, easy, TOTALLY STRESS FREE RHYTHM.  True; after breakfast I never ever get dressed in my BATHING SUIT, and go sit by the pool with a book, and just let that sun sink into the bones. 

Of course in THE REAL WORLD, I will have to wait at least 4 more months--3 if I'm lucky, to wear my SUPA SEXAY sandals and a TOE RING, and go out for a really fun dinner, where you sit outside, and even if it's a cool evening, it's okay, because there are overhead heaters, and that table behind you has a fire going in the middle of it, and as you sip your habenero lime Corona, some balding dude is playing "yellow bird" on the steel drums.  And oh how you laugh!  You laugh and laugh, because you haven't got A FREAKING CARE IN THE WORLD.  Oh, and the dinner you're eating?  Well, it has NOTHING to do with casseroles, or heating up chicken nuggets, or slapping peanut butter on bread.'s a masterful combination of a boneless buttermilk fried chicken breast, set on top of the best mashed potatoes ever, surrounded by fire roasted corn salsa.  AND, DAMN--HALF THE FUN IS THAT YOU DIDN'T COOK IT YOURSELF, and the other half is that it's the most exciting restaurant meal you've had in a long time! 

But yeah, I'm a rational adult.  I know that one can't go out for lovely, gorgeous meals all the time. 

Sure, I realise that it's February, so even though it was a treat to go barefoot again, and idle along a beach hunting for little conch shells, and throwing them back in the ocean if they still have little guys living in them, and as they sail back to the sea, you happily call; "LIVE ANOTHER DAY, LITTLE BUDDY!" 

Wait...what was I trying to say?  Oh yeah, that kind of lifestyle is a TREAT, and not the norm, so I should just feel lucky that I got to have it for 5 1/2 fabulous days. 


I should feel lucky.

And rested.

And restored.


WELL F$CK THAT!!!!  Okay people, I finally got home at around 1:15 AM Tuesday, and I felt all happy to be home.  Yay, I'm back in Canada!  Oh hooray!  It's cold the way winter is SUPPOSED TO BE.  Oh goody, I'll be able to drink my own blend of coffee again.  Oh joy--my sweet little chillin's!  OOo, look at how appealing The Man is!  Kitties?  Kitties!!!!  Oh you little furry rats, come give me a hug!  Aw, look at that--the pantry is littered with Jack's rejected drawings!  Oh, lovely, familiar mess!  Chuckle, chuckle, their bedroom floors are covered with clothes...oh the little dickens! 

The sun is shining!  It's a beautiful (Canadian Winter, ie; not beautiful) day!  The filthy snow is starting to melt, so it's slushy and puddle-y everywhere!  Oh, I can't wait to get back into my routine!  I can't believe it--I'M JUST SO HAPPY!  I FEEL SO REVITALIZED, AND I SMELL FREAKING AWESOME FROM THIS NEW PERFUME I BOUGHT!  EVERYTHING * IS * GREAT!!!!

That lasted till 5:00 pm, Tuesday. 

That lovely, stress-free, restored feeling lasted for 17 hours, but I slept for 7 of them, so that equals 10 hours of feeling great thanks to my little vacation.  Then, it was me frantically making that nice, roast chicken dinner with lots of veggies for my family, and the kids freaking out that dinner wasn't ready yet, and then Ella and Jack trying to throttle one another, and I couldn't go for a power walk this morning, because all that slush froze into treacherous ice, and well, you get the picture.

Oh, but I'd better go.  Everybody was kind of enough to leave their laundry for me!  Isn't that SUPER?  Which one of y'all out there would be happy to return home to a literally overflowing laundry basket?  Anyone?  Anyone? 

Yeah, that's what I thought. 


  1. Can you go back?
    Sounds like you had a fab vacation Karen and you deserved it!!!
    I hope you get to do this again next year!
    Oh how I would love to be on a beach right now!

  2. Did you REALLY expect anything different?? LOL You take care of so much and you do it so efficiently, how do you expect The Man to do anything the same as you would... It's either that or he needs a good swift kick in the pants! I'm glad you had a good time. And welcome back to the trenches...

  3. Glad your back to make me laugh, but I understand, all too well, I still miss Hawaii all the time and I just miss all vacations, sunshine and relaxing all the time!


  5. yeah, you know what Pam--I think I will make it my annual thing. Loved the sunshine.

  6. Bec, I was totally naive. I told Jon that I had this ridiculous notion that I would be gone, and the kids would shake hands and say; "hey, when Mom gets back, let's not fight anymore, kay?" Har har. SERENITY NOW!!!

    Still, Jon read my grouchy mind, and like I said, he's doing laundry now, so my anger and poutiness vanished. hooray!

  7. thanks JD--it's true: nobody likes returning from a vacation. I've often wondered in the past if they're actually good, or make things worse in a way!

  8. Jon's da man!!! Guilt and regret DOES take the edge off our anger, doesn't it?

    Ya, that fantasy about the kids' pact WAS stretching it more than a little...

  9. But Matt, it was such a lovely fantasy...shall I sing "the impossile dream" now? Sigh.

  10. I would love to have been on a vacation......I have been on two in 23 to Saskatoon, in a hotel with a pool for my kids which one did not know how to swim which was stressful, and hubby worked the whole time. My 3rd child barfed in the restaurant BEFORE he ate because he was so hungry from the traveling in the middle of nowhere with no food stops. Oh and the 2nd daughter yells out so everyone in the restaurant can here..."CHRISTOPHER'S BARFING"

    My first actual vacation was with my hubbies mother and 2 sisters. Little pee-on sister in law had no say in what we did...and just wanted to float in the ocean while the rest of the rich sisters only wanted to eat in buffets that had BUTTER..thus eliminating Denny's. which was all my budget could afford. Me trying to talk code into the phone that I was running out of money which sisters in law decoded and had a major FREAK about, me not saying what was on my mind, so I did, and then they all patronized. which burned my butt that they finally stopped shopping and ended up going to Hanama Bay which I wanted to go to and tried to on my own, but got stuck in a construction zone and never made it....all the while sisters in law friggin telling me how wonderful Hanama Bay was.....YAH and that was the only place I wanted to visit.

    And never got there while they never wanted to go but I cried and cried and cried, and came home and found out I was pregnant with number 3.

  11. sounds like it was positively fabulous! i miss the days of having child free hours to relax. and to think i thought my life was tough then. i didn't have a clue.
    i'm impressed that your man even did the laundry when you got home! it's all i can do to get mine to clean the litter box when i'm gone so that the cats won't crap on the rug.

  12. so grouchy right now that I'll have to respond to your comments later, Ms. Melissa and Ms. Sherilin.

  13. pms and headache induced anger make paula go something mean crazy? don't mind if i do!!!! oh when will this day end???? i need another vacation. [that was a simpsons quote try looking it up on you tube it might make you feel a liitle better] it is no beer and no tv make homer go...


I lurv comments. Thank you for the comments. They are scrumptious.


Related Posts with Thumbnails