Figuring out what I wanna be when I grow up.
Oop..I AM grown up...

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Goals And/Or Dreams

Everybody has goals and dreams, right?  On this, the soggy, rainy, miserably grey day of my birth, I present mine for you! 

You're welcome!

1) To be less heavy rotund girthsome chubby by the time I'm 40.  I'm 39 now for crap's sake, and I don't want to be GRANDMAW JOWELS INNA SWEATER next winter. 

2) To eat lunch EVERY DAY!  Lousy eating. 

3) to drink lots of disgusting water every day.  I H8 drinking water for the sake of drinking water.  I can't think of anything that tastes worse when I'm not thirsty.  Gee, I'm not thirsty at all, let me go gag down 48 ounces of fluid.  Yech.

4) to master drinking whisky STRAIGHT, unaided by COLA.  Just think how cool it would be to one day hear someone say; "GET GRAMMA HER WHISKY!"  You know that sounds awesome. 

5) to not be a grocery store cashier if/when I reenter the work world.  NO, this is not a put-down to the hard-working, underpaid, verbally abused, much maligned ladies who pack my groceries each week.  It's just that if I have to serve the public again in this lifetime, I'll swallow an entire bottle of aspirin. 

6) Get back into my spanish language cdrom.  Spanish is the SHIZNIT.  I was once awesome enough on vacation to be able to chirp out; "NECESSITO CAMBIAR DOLARES POR PESOS, POR FAVOR!"  SUCK ON THAT, B*TCHES!

7) to elevate smart assery from a mere hobby to brilliance.  OH wait--done and done.

8) To do a little research, get some word of mouth info and find a magical DUMP in the US of A that is famous for its own signature creation of some unbelievably decadent and disgusting DINER FOOD, THEN, go on a road trip to said diner and eat that amazing melty-cheese covered mountain.  Yes, that is my DREAM.  We just don't have that kind of horror food here in Canada.  Do you know what Canadians always talk about when they return from the States?  PORTION SIZES.  That's right--you people are INFAMOUS for portion sizes.  You know what else Canadians talk about?  THE WEATHER.  UNTIL YOU WANT TO THROW UP. 

9) To find that magical hair colour I can be satisfied with (not possible)

10) To FINALLY crack the shrink wrap off the yoga DVD I bought before Christmas

11) To try Zumba.  Damn that looks fun.  But OH, the tug of INERTIA.

12) To change my blog url to www dot ow my angst dot etc, because a) why not? and b) I still couldn't tell you my blog address if you asked me.  Some sh*tty jerk probably already took it though.  You just never know.

13) To find a real-life approximation of Jamie Fraser and just ogle him and listen to that scrumptious Scottish accent.  Don't look at me that way.  The Man and I are stuck together like flies to fly paper, and he's perfectly hawt himself, albeit lacking in that accent. 

14) to not be such a cheapskate and buy the stuff needed to make Tiramisu.  Never made it.  Never had it, but it sounds FLIPPING DELICIOUS. 

15) to get to those 10 loads of laundry sitting sorted in piles on my bedroom floor, so that when I want to go anywhere in my room, I'm either standing on laundry, or tip toeing in the teeny little spaces between it. 

16) to get a coffee.  The end.

I went from #73 to #90!  How's that for a b-day kick in the a$$!!
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  1. Happy Birthday Karen!!

    I hate drinking water too...really i am so glad someone else admitted it. These people who walk around with their bottles...yuk.

    Oh Karen gasp i just applied to be a cashier at the local grocery you are scarying me!!!
    I have to get a job and i thought this one would be the best choice considering they pay better than Walmart (union) and the shops around town...I dread going back to work but unfortunately my hubby's business is still slow.
    Oh welcome to the forties!

  2. Oh my, that's some list. Right after that coffee, you better get cracking on it.
    And what's with you and Pamela not liking water? I love it. I drink it while I'm peeing. What, I have one hand free!
    Anyway, I hope that you have the best birthday ever. Sorry about the suckage in the weather.
    Happy Birthday!
    Your Friend, m.

  3. yeah, but Pam, you're friendlier than I am, and don't seem to find people as irritating, so you'd be just fine. Or am I wrong about your feelings toward people...
    Oh well, at any rate, we do what we gotta do.

  4. Mark, water can certainly become a habit, and it's true that the more you drink it, the easier it is to dirnk it all the time. HOWEVER, lose the habit, and it's yucky once again (when you're not thirsty that is). Thanks for the birthday wishes!


    I love water. I don't drink anything else, really. Sometime sparkling water. Of course, I used to be a diet coke and coffee addict. That was delicious. And jittery.

    I like your goals. I need to come up with some besides "stop being lame" and "jesus, get a grip."

  6. ooooo..jamie fraser,he could make even straight guys fall in love with him....sigh.i am rereading the outlander books and i even got matt to start reading it!!unhappy bithday from matt too!p.s. at least your man has an accent,even if it is not scot.

  7. dude - you rock. you can get that URL easy - here to help if you want.
    Water: me too - thanks for the reminder and all those goals are achievable!!!!! email me - I'll help if you want.

  8. Jesus get a grip is a brilliant goal. In fact, its the enabler to make all the other goals happen, don't you think??? I only drink one cup of coffee per day thanks to the jitters, and that ohmygodmylifesucksandi'mdyingofcancer feeling that comes with too much caffeine.

  9. true Paula, but that Jamie Fraser is a panty melter. Good lord. And I have YOU to thank for introducing me to him. Tell Matt thanks, and to hurry up and be done with this Lent/willpower stuff!

  10. thanks Christina! I can tell that you're far more savvy about internetish/html things than I! I actually know how to get my own url, so that's a small miracle right there. Is your email on your profile/blog page? Thanks!

  11. panty melter, i like that ha!you have got to read karen monings fever series,[go to her site to see the order of the books,cause i forget]that jerrico barrons is yummers!

  12. ooo, more yummy fictional men! Hooray!

  13. Get Gramma her Whisky!!! hahahhaaa!

    Happy Birthday Dear!


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