Okay, so I just clacked up my Florida vacation rehash EXTRAVAGANZA, right? Oh, first, can I say that at least three of you were horrified by how long it was. I want you to know that this reaction does not horrify me, but instead, it DELIGHTS ME. Wonderful! Just wonderful! I had a lot to say people.
So, I've been back for two days now, and my dad is still in Florida. He just emailed me a whack of photos from the trip.
I'm spiraling to the bottom. Actually, I'm going to get The Man to go out and BUY ME A MASK. Why? Because, clearly? I'm HIDEOUS. Oh the tragedy. Or, au naturel karen is hideous. But same difference.
Before I went away, in a little store near my house, I saw this hat. It's a large brimmed straw hat, that is white, with blue rings. I thought it was awesome. Also, it fit my head. I felt a little hesitant to buy it because it's a bit frou frou. It's a bit hoity toity. It's a bit la-di-daaaaa. But I thought, HELL WITH IT. I'm ALMOST FORTY. I can wear WHATEVER THE HELL I WANT. If I want to be GLAMOUROUS, I'm going to f*cking well be GLAMOUROUS. I'm going to be at the pool in my low cut bathing suit, and my big, glamourous hat, and I'm going to look like this:
That's right. If the vintage loving gals I love to read there on my right sidebar of the blog (Curtise, Sarah, Helga, and Miss Simmonds) live glamour and fun clothes all the time, so can I!
Then my dad sent the pictures.
They are all SO UGLY. SO INCREDIBLY SHOCKINGLY HIDEOUS that I can't even share them with you.
I get a terrible double chin when I have the PMS. :(
That hat? That hat looks SO RIDICULOUS that when my dad drives it home (no room in my suitcase after the rampage scented goodies purchasing at Victoria's Secret) I am going to take that hat. I am going to burn that hat. And then I am going to pee on it.
I'll just have to show you the arted version I did for you instead:
Ever had that happen where you were convinced you looked awesome...until the pics came back???