Figuring out what I wanna be when I grow up.
Oop..I AM grown up...


Thursday, March 29, 2012

The Ugliest I Have EVER Looked

This is the only photo of me from my recent vacation that I like:







That's my sis and I having both simultaneously woken up from MONSTROUS NAPS a few hours after we arrived in Florida.


So, after looking at those AWFUL photos and hitting rock bottom, I came in the house after I'd cleaned out my backyard garden, got the camera out and took some snaps of myself to see if I truly am THAT hideous now.

Here:  burn THESE images into your brain before you look at THE UGLIEST PHOTO EVER.


un-edited photo.  



and one with teeth even, since I just had em shined up at the dentist!

Okay....it's time.

Click HERE FOR THE UGLIEST PHOTO EVER

45 comments:

  1. I don't know what you are talking about. That shot is NOT ugly.

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    1. That shot? On the other page? The one in which I look exactly like someone's gramma, wintering in Florida? All decked out in her best hat? Oh man. I thought it was just hideous. Surely you're being too kind, Melissa!

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    2. OH THAT PICTURE! I have never laughed that hard....sorry not at you but that I MISSED the whole picture thing...I thought you were talking about the one with you and your sister. I was like what is she talking about......and besides the one with the cool had is not that bad....at least the hat is big enough that we cannot really see you!

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    3. yeah, I was wondering if you missed it! I like the one of my sis and I luckily. It is too that bad! I stand behind its badness. I am now going to defend its badness. It deserves that much. Luckily the photo is a bit dark and that's why you can't quite see me :)

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  2. you look lovely after doing yard work! and for the record, while that "other" picture may not be the best shot of you ever, it's far from the hideosity that you imagine it to be. just a bad angle.
    also, you're looking quite thin in that top shot. and doing so while wearing white is quite an accomplishment!
    way to go with your shredded self!

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    1. thanks Sherilin! No shots from my RIGHT SIDE--EVER! That's the weird side anyway. The hair is stupider on that side--it seems thinner and less inclined to do what I want.

      Thanks about the "shredded" look. There's this one pic of me in that hat (and it looks soo stupid), and I'm sitting there on a chair with a towel over midsection, and these short, white porkchop legs poking out, and it looks SO DORKY. Dorky is the word.

      I wasn't aware that white is more of a danger colour...hrm...you may be right! I like white a lot too. I have to find some new shorts for this summer too, because my white ones are also a little frumpadump.

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    2. white is a danger color for me i guess because i think darker colors hide my flaws better. also, i'm so pale that white makes me worse and makes my teeth look yellower than ever. i have issues.

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    3. Oh we all have issues. We are all in the issues boat. Issues, issues, issues. Sigh.

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    4. Oooo, my right side is the wonky one too! It's like the weird, funky looking me.

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  3. what the hell is wrong with you woman?! You're worse than me... those are great photos, though obviously you can't see it, I know what that's like. I'd be sooooo happy if I had your kathleen-turner-before-the-pies-and-age face!!!

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    1. BEFORE THE PIES AND AGE! That's it. That made my day. Brilliant. Dear Miss Simmonds, didn't you see GRAMAW WINTERING IN FLORIDA on the other page?

      This is interesting. I was CONVINCED that picture is EXACTLY AS BAD as I built it up to be.

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  4. Aw, these three women before are so nice. You need to hold to them. And since I want to remain your friend too, how 'bout I just say "funny post" and be done with it!
    m.

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    1. Fair enough! I was hoping someone would say; "yeah karen--that other photo IS really bad!"

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  5. I could go on a big long rant about how we expect way to much of ourselves and are surrounded by unrealistic images of women and all that jazz. And it's true.

    But it sucks to feel so great on the inside and then have that lying bastard, the camera, snap one image in one microsecond and erase all that.

    Just remember how you were feeling at that moment. Screw everything else.

    Also, you have nice eyebrows.

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    1. thanks Tumbleweed! A very stylish, sophisticated French makeup artist refined my eyebrows several years ago. She was very disdainful of the shape I had been TRYING to achieve.

      True, true and true: re; how we feel inside, vs the photo vs our own expectations of how we should look.

      I was feeling very relaxed at the moment!

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  6. Karen you are too cute to be ugly period. Love the photo of you and your sister..good times!!!

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    1. thanks Pam. That's because you have an image of me as a round faced kid burned into your brain forever :)

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  7. Oh honey, I've got you beat by a hundred miles. Yep, the hat is fugly. But the girl is a cutie pie.

    Wanna have a fugly contest? We could all agree to post our fugliest photo on the same date. It could be a blog-wide thing - like a revolution. Or a FUG-volution!!!! What do you say? Come on, please say yes.

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    1. lol! a blogosphere wide day of ugly photos! that could be a new meme!
      it makes me laugh about the hat being fugly. teeheee!

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    2. yes, this sounds like a must-do. I'm just pondering how exactly we should all go about it!

      It should be, eh Sherilin!

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  8. you aren't ugly! you're beautiful! But I know how you feel, my husband is constanting taking pictures of me hunched over and rocking the double chins out and I am horrified! Then I go in the bathroom and take about 20 picture and pick the least hideous! HAHAHA!

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    1. jd, you cracked me up--rocking the double chins: LOL. Yeah, that's about the size of it and it's so true: the bathroom IS where I take most of my "cute" photos too.

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  9. Honestly, that picture isn't bad. You just look like a person.

    The problem here is that you were picturing uber-chic.

    Also, the photographer OBVIOUSLY needs a lesson in how to photograph a woman. Should be slighly above, with eyes looking up from under the brim of the hat. It also skinnies anyone down. NEVER take a woman from slightly below, or from the side when she's looking down... it will make Christy Brinkley look like she has a double chin.

    That said, I love the hat. But I actually own two or three ginormous hats. That I wear.

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    1. Leauxra, you have made me look at things in a whole new perspective! The photographer--AKA MY FREAKING DAD, is FIRED.

      It would make Christy Brinkley look like she has a double chin! SNIFF! That is PROFOUND, WOMAN. PROFOUND.

      Meh--you probably look glamourous in your ginormous hats :)

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  10. Gurl, don't make me come up there and beat you!!!! I saw the damming pics and they are not bad. I think you look gorgeous and if I were a lesbian I'd date you. There, I said it.

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    1. lol! karen, you've got a lesbian proposition here! rock it, baby!

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    2. I'm going to accept. Sometimes husbands snore too much, and I bet I'd never have to beg Lizbeth to clean the litter box. We'd take turns in fact!

      But I still say the bad pic was indeed bad.

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    3. i sometimes think that getting a wife is the way to go. i'd clean the litter box my fair share & i'd hardly complain at all.

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  11. oh the spools i got at the neighbors...and I will be 45 this year when my last kid grads......yah baby, I love it.....old enough to be smart, and young enough to still enjoy life....

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    1. Like I said Melissa: you did it RIGHT! Good for you. The spools are very cool.

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  12. Hey you. Please stop calling yourself ugly because I think you are beautiful. Pms and all. That hat, though...

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    1. LOL! Thanks Leanne. That was one hideous photo though. ADMIT IT! ADMIT IT!

      Can't you see me wearing a wide strapped tank sleeveless shirt, some great big polyester shorts and some very sensible sandals under my CANKLES? I totally imagine that.

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  13. Right, Karen - let's sort this out once and for all. The Photo of Doom? Maybe not the most flattering but nothing like as bad as you think it is. And you weren't posing, the angles are all wrong, and you have a particular sensitivity about your face/chin/PMS bloat issue, so that's all you can see.
    Actually, the photo is just an average snap of someone taken unawares and not camera-ready.
    One not-so-flattering photo does NOT mean you are ugly, hideous, fat, or anything else you've said about yourself. It's just one photo.
    The hat? Don't you dare pee on, burn or otherwise deface that hat, I like it!
    Look at how gorgeous you look in the other photos. You look wonderful when you're laughing (I look like a horse, which is why I don't pose with a smile. Ever.) EVERYONE has unflattering photos of themselves. Take a look, shake your head at how outrageous it is that someone failed to capture your fabulousness, laugh if you can, then forget about it. You're BEAUTIFUL!!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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    1. Well there's an interesting lesson to be learned as far as perception goes! I thought it was SHOCKINGLY BAD, and even my sister made the super sympathetic face when she saw it too.

      Well there you go, Curtise. I always think you look chic and elegant in your pics, with really fabulous hair! My hair is pretty unmanageable, and I love your haircut, and the glossy way it all falls into place.

      See? Why can't we see these things in ourselves???

      I might have to send YOU the hat :)

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  14. Oh Karen, it's just a matter of chin up when being photographed. (Seven veils don't hurt at my age, either.)

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    1. chin up! LITERALLY! Jeanne, maybe I saw my paternal grandmother in that shot and well...shut up now karen, just shut up.

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  15. You are a keeper but the hat has to go! I don't have my picture taken - that way I don't have to relive the fugly moments!

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    1. SMART WOMAN, DAMN IT! Yeah, the hat is so stupid. I'm going to post some more photos of how stupid the hat is. Pity, because it was so good at keeping ALL the sun off my face!

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  16. Are you SURE you know what the definition of hideous means? Cause I don't think that you do.

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  17. Ruth, did you not click the link at the bottom of the post, because that's the photo I'm talking about!!! I only mention this because Melissa (comments near the beginning) totally missed the link, and thought I was complaining about the photos I took myself, and the one photo I liked from my vacay.

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    1. I saw it. So, it's not the most flattering picture in the world. I still wouldn't call it hideous.

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    2. I'm telling ya--it's somebody's gramaw who winters in florida! It's a lot of extra chin. The problem is, there were a lot of chin-o-riffic photos, so by the time I saw that one, I was all 'AW COME ON!'

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    3. Fine! That is the most hideous double chin I have ever seen in my entire life! Is that what you wanna hear?

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